Category Archives: Holidays

Go Shorty

I’m gonna party like it’s my birthday.

Because it IS my birthday! Today I am 25 years old, which is the same as a quarter of a century, in case you were wondering. I’ve been joking that I am old now, but the truth is that life has only gotten better as I’ve gotten older, more sure of myself, more confident, etc, so I say bring it on.

Or am I too old to say things like ‘bring it on’? I might be. I guess I have to stop saying  ‘raise the roof’, too.

Ooh, and maybe now I’m old enough to start yelling at the pre-teens at the mall to put some damn clothes on already, because it’s 20 degrees outside, and when I was your age we wore parkas, not mini-skirts.

Apparently for me, 25 comes with a tendency toward crotchety behavior.

Also, early-senility, as I would really like to leave to go to the mall right now (need an outfit to wear tonight to go with the gorgeous necklace that a certain someone got me for my birthday, because obviously I have NOTHING TO WEAR, that bursting closet is a figment of your imagination) but I seem to have misplaced my keys. Oops.

Happy birthday to me! And Happy New Year to all of you!

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Filed under Holidays, My Sweet Babboo

A very discombobulated Christmas re-cap.

Hello, duckies! Did you all have a good Christmas? (Or whatever holiday it is that you celebrate…)  I sure did, and I’m sad that it’s over. However, I have my pile of loot to keep my mind off of the fact that Christmas is now so very very far away.

Christmas was a bit of a blur, what with the waking up at 6am to exchange presents, shower, and drive to Matt’s parents’ house in time to exchange presents with them, eat a delicious breakfast prepared by Matt’s dad, and then drive to New Hampshire to spend time with Matt’s family at his aunt’s house. It was a long day, is all I’m sayin… However, Matt was happy with his gifts (or else he is just really talented at faking surprise and delight, one never knows) so I felt like I did a good job. His big gift was a set of new ski pants and a new ski jacket, along with a pass to a mountain near-ish to us. He really liked it, and we’ll have fun hitting the slopes this season.

I got a bunch of fancy new baking equipment, which is a definite upgrade to the hand-me-downs and Target specials that I have been using since college. Not that there is anything wrong with Target specials… but they don’t hold a candle to Williams Sonoma and my pretty new gadgets! (Imagine – measuring cups on which one can actually readthe unit of measurement, because it has not rubbed off over time!) Of course, I had already done my storm of baking* before Christmas morning, but they will be used plenty in the future.

My biggest gift was my very first ever designer handbag. I know – I KNOW – that they are a lot of money and that there are better things that the money could be spent on, and there really isn’t anything WRONG with a handbag from Target. But… But! It’s pretty. So very pretty. And you can pry it out of my cold dead fingers, OK?

Anyway, I’m back at work this week, where there is no one here and so I have had plenty of time to browse the after Christmas specials online. Today I will be leaving a bit early because two of my friends from college are coming into town. They are spending the night at our house and it will be fun to see them and catch up. Then I just have to make it through work tomorrow, and then it is time to enjoy my very own Birthday Weekend, now with extra Birthday since it will be a 4 day weekend for me. It also comes with a side of old age. (But not really, because I don’t care; it’s just that I can remember being a kid and thinking that when I got to this age I would be an adult. Which – HA – but still…)

Well that’s all for now, but I guess one of these days I should get around to some kind of yearly re-cap. I kind of like the little meme that -R- has up today so I may steal it if that is OK with her?? Until then, I am off to plot exactly how much time I can waste before I have to get some actual work done.

*I made my world-famous (or, you know, famous with Matt’s family) pumpkin pie, candy cane cookies (oooh, alliteration AND deliciousness), and cookie dough truffles (they taste and look awesome, but there was chocolate EVERYWHERE when I was done). Yummmm.

(Updated to add: Since -R- asked so nicely, here’s a picture of the purse. Hello, my preshus!)

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And to all a good night.

Just popping in to wish you all a holiday filled with love, laughter, and just the right amount of shameless materialism.

Merry Christmas to all!

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Back

So…. I guess I kind of disappeared for a while there, huh. And during the month when I should have been posting every day! The horror!

I don’t have an entirely excellent reason why I was gone, but assuming that you care, it had something to do with work, and a kind of hugely important thing that got screwed up, and needing to fix it. Luckily, with the application of (a lot of my) time and (a lot of the company’s) money all is well and fixed and fine.

There’s also been some family stuff happening which has been, ahem, rather unpleasant, and so I wasn’t really feeling up to 1) being humorous (Wait – I’m humorous, right? I mean, I don’t want to assume and then have you think that I think I’m funny, when really I’m not funny at all. In my real life, I don’t consider myself to be all that funny, but I think some of the stuff on here is pretty funny. I mean, spaghetti! On a wall! It’s a riot!) and 2) delving into some of my life’s less flattering moments.

So there you have it.

But! But, I did have a lovely Thanksgiving, complete with lots of pie. And my Black Friday shopping endeavors were fairly successful. Don’t worry, I’m not one of those crazies who’s out at the mall at 5am. I rolled out of bed at 6:30, and with a few clicks of the mouse, I had my items and the stores had my dollars, and I was back in bed by 7:15. Success!

Among the items purchased was a GPS, and while I’m sorry to say that this purchase will likely result in a decrease of the number of embarrassing stories I have to tell in the future, I am convinced that it will also be a life-changing purchase. Because, you see, I have no sense of direction, and getting lost really stresses me out. Matt kind of has a sense of direction, but getting lost makes him curse a lot. And I don’t know about the areas that you live in, but around here Mapquest (or Google Maps, or whatever) sucks. Boston (and its surrounding suburbs) is a city made almost entirely of 18th century cow paths that someone decided to pave into roads, and with construction and the Big Dig, this all basically translates to: YOU AIN’T GOIN’ NOWHERE. At least without getting lost. Enter my new beloved GPS, which Santa brought for Matt and I as an early Christmas present.

In other news, do you want to know what else I did this weekend? I organized my closet, and went through all of my clothes, and I tried on all of my old clothes, and you know what? THEY FIT.

I’ve been waiting to talk about this, and while I realize that the week following the Great Pie Consumption of 2007 might not be the best time to do it, I want to talk about weight loss, and the fact that I, personally, have lost it. Weight, that is. The thing is, I know we’re all supposed to be happy with ourselves, and focused on being healthy and not the number on the tag, and media images and unhealthy habits and blah de blah blah blah, but the fact is, I was unhappy. Really, really unhappy. And for once in my life, I up and did something about it.

Sure I whined about it for a while first, as some readers might remember, but then at the end of August I started anew. I had lost about 10 pounds by the time I went to NJ to visit with Liz in mid-October, and as of right now I am only a tiny bit shy (it’s that damn pie) of being 20 pounds lighter than I was at the end of August. Sure, there are things that I still want to work on (Hello, triceps! And you stupid, stupid thighs!) but for the most part I am really happy, and I swear when I put on those old jeans (and I could both zip them AND breathe at the same time) there was the sound of angels singing. Because while I know, I KNOW, that it’s not about the number on the tag, and stores are making their clothes bigger to make women feel better about that stupid number, I don’t care, because SIZE SIX, BITCHES.

Ahem.

Anyway, as good as those jeans made me feel, I honestly do feel even better about being happy with myself, and accomplishing something, even something as trivial as reduction of the size of my ass. (I should get a medal. Or maybe a plaque.)

So now that I’m feeling all warm and fuzzy and small-assed (or you know, smallER-assed), let me go ahead and promise more stories of humiliation. I guess since I missed all those days of NaBloPoMo, I will just post the very best of the remaining stories for the next few days, finishing with the Queen Mother on Friday, or maybe sometime next week, depending on how many stories I have left. (You still want to hear the Queen Mother, don’t you?) Since I kind of kicked the whole theory of NaBloPoMo out the window, I guess it doesn’t matter if I actually tell the final tale on the last day of the month.

Also, wanna know something amazing? Or, rather, someONE? The fabulous Sherry has agreed to do a guest post with her very own embarrassing moment. Sherry is fabulous for many reasons: she likes board games, reading, and ice cream, which I personally think are some very good things to like. Also, her guest post is pretty darn good, so I look forward to sharing it with you.  I will be posting Sherry’s guest post on Thursday, so be sure to check back and see that I am not the only one who manages to do silly things sometimes!

That’s all for today, duckies. It’s good to be back!

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Filed under Family, Holidays, Life in New England, NaBloPoMo 2007, Project Old Pants, Retail Therapy

Halloweenie

Not much to say but I couldn’t let the day pass without a quick: Happy Halloween!

We won’t be doing much tonight; we originally planned to go to Salem but by the time we got there it would be pretty late, and it’s cold, and we are lazy and old, so we decided to skip it. I don’t even know if we’ll give out candy, because 1) I didn’t buy any candy, 2) if I do buy candy I will eat all of it because 3) we didn’t get that many trick-or-treaters last year. There are a lot of kids in our neighborhood, but I don’t think they wanted to venture down our long driveway, even though I turned on all the lights to make our house not seem like the scary house at the end of the long dark driveway.

At one point I was standing in the middle of the driveway yelling at the kids across the street to come eat my candy, which I’m sure sounded both creepy AND dirty. The few who did venture over were treated to hand-fulls of candy because I was determined not to have any left over. Of course, I failed miserably and spent the next week convincing myself that it was perfectly acceptable to eat 5 Almond Joys for breakfast.

Happy Halloween!

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Smorgasbord

Huh. Who knew that was even a real word? I thought I’d just type in some lame ass attempt at the spelling and you’d guess what I meant, but it turns out there’s a real live spelling. I’m really classin’ this place up, what with the big words and the spelling them correctly.

***

Do you like pumpkin food items? By this I mean, do you have to resist the urge to cram your mouth/stomach/jiggly thighs with pumpkin muffins/pies/cakes/etc this time of year? Because I do. I love it all. Surprisingly, pumpkin pie is probably my least favorite of all the pumpkin offerings, but I start salivating at the mere thought of pumpkin muffins, donuts, and lattes. YUM.

If you are anything like me when it comes to the pumpkin-love, you should make this recipe. I found it via Lawyerish, and when she described scraping some pumpkin loaf remnants off of her oven racks to eat them, I knew this was a recipe for me.

A word of caution: if you are going to make this pumpkin loaf, make sure you have to leave the house to attend a party approximately ten minutes after said loaf is removed from the oven. Also be sure to bring the loaf with you to the party; even though you will find yourself drooling over the smell of the loaf coming from the back seat, this is a far better alternative to stuffing the entire delicious, pumpkiny thing into your gaping maw.

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Speaking of parties, we went to the annual Halloween bash thrown by Matt’s family on Saturday night. As usual, it was awesome, and made more awesome by the fact that we won top prize in the costume contest. Usually the prizes are somewhat lacking, but this year we were the recipients of a cold hard cash prize. Sweet.

We boogied the night away and sweat our asses off (seriously, polyester has got some major insulating powers, what were those 70’s era people thinking??) and had a damn good time.

***

Answer me this:

Why do women think that the very essence of Halloween is to dress up in the sluttiest outfit they can find? If it’s really that necessary for you to embrace your inner hooker, I know a street corner that you can stand on. But I think even a real hooker would leave more to the imagination.

And while we’re at it, why do the companies that make costumes have such a difficult time with boundaries on these slutty costumes? Now it’s not enough to be a witch, you have to be a sexy witch. Or a naughty nurse. Or a sultry vampire. I guess this would be fine if they hadn’t taken to bastardizing every other genre out there. I’m pretty sure that Little Red Riding Hood didn’t wear thigh highs and a garter belt. I’m also fairly certain that Gretel never went out with her ass crack showing.

Also, if we’re assuming that based on their Halloween attire, all women want to be hookers, then apparently all men want to cross dress. Because men seem to think that they should all dress as women for Halloween. As if you wearing boobs is going to get you any closer to mine. Um, no.

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This nearly made me pee my pants this morning. I think that H’s sense of humor is very similar to Matt’s, which is probably why I find this to be so darn funny. And of course, I love me some -R-, too.

***

Is it wrong that after the Red Sox won the World Series last night, I was less excited about the win than about the fact that I can finally start going to bed at a reasonable hour? There are many things that I do not understand in the world, not the least of which is WHY AN 8PM START, FOX? WHY? You suck. Do you need more time to stick Jeanne Zelasko’s finger in a socket? Is that what it is? Seriously, what are you doing to that poor woman’s head?

***

…Aaaand, that’s all I’ve got.

Happy Monday! May the week pass swiftly!

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Filed under Dance Fever, Holidays, Life in New England, My Sweet Babboo, Uncategorized

Halloween, part one of many

Last night Matt and I had our first opportunity to wear our Halloween costumes at the party at our dance school. Even though the set-up is somewhat similar to a middle school dance (no drinking, but plenty of punch and cake; decorations from the dollar store; party games to get everyone involved) we had a really good time last year, and this year did not disappoint either.

Our costumes were definitely well received, especially since people actually broke into spontaneous applause for us when we walked in the door. We did some good disco moves and boogied the night away as good disco dancers should. Then tomorrow night we’re going to the big party that Matt’s family throws every year. They rent out a hall and there’s a band and a bar – these people know how to party.

Today I am sleepwalking my way through work, as I am an old, decrepit lady who cannot party on a Thursday night anymore, even if said party is over at 11 and said lady is in her bed watching game 2 of the World Series by 11:30. And today I will also be the miserly old lady who does not give out candy to her co-workers’ kids, because I do not believe that children should be at work. Unfortunately, our company disagrees, and actually encourages people to bring their rug-rats little cherubs in for a party and to trick-or-treat. Keep those grubby little hands out of my cubicle, is all I’m sayin’.

Really, it’s not that I have anything against kids, and I think we all know that I have nothing against Halloween… I just really don’t think that it’s reasonable to expect to get work done when there are kids yelling their way through the halls. Kids will be kids, and you can’t expect them to be quiet, but I have stuff to do before I can go enjoy the weekend, and I’d like a little peace and quiet.

Hello. Am Scrooge.

Anyway, have a happy Halloween weekend! I hope it’s groovy.

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Filed under Dance Fever, Holidays