I know you didn’t think I was a ‘look on the bright side’ kind of person.

Oh, Internet. I’m unhappy. Really really unhappy. I know that I should be able to, but I just can’t seem to separate work happiness from personal happiness. Or, in this case, unhappiness. And really, how many times can I use some form of the word ‘happy’ in paragraph that is meant to describe how miserable I am?

(Warning : sweeping generalizations ahead.) My boss has this theory that guys are better able to separate business from personal than women are. That’s how they can sit in a conference room yelling at each other and then walk out, slap each other on the back, and set up a time to play golf. If you yell at a woman, you are not getting back on her good side that easily. Unless it is with flowers. Or some jewelry. And even then she is still likely to never forget it.

I have to say that I agree with this theory.  But the description I gave makes it sound like women are wimpy and can’t handle a business environment, which isn’t true at all. I think women actually have the better approach, because we recognize that work is such a big part of our lives that it IS personal. We know that people are not just desk-sitting drones and that they have feelings and lives outside of work. And I think that’s important. I just think it sucks in situations like the one I am in now, where I wish that I could turn off my emotions and just show up to work and do the job asked of me, nothing more and nothing less.

The problem is that my feelings right now are not in the category of ‘motivated and pleasant to be around.’ They are running the gamut from sad to angry to extremely freakin’ pissed off. Which makes me just a delight to be around, I’m sure. I’m trying not to bring this stuff home with me… but I’m sure Matt would tell you that I am failing miserably.

I’m sorry that I don’t have anything better to say. I’m sure I should be thinking positive, or looking for the silver lining, or some such bullshit. But I can’t. And I won’t. At least not right now. Right now I need to wallow in this suckitude and complain about it and possibly drink a margarita.

A very LARGE margarita. And maybe if it came with an extra large amount of tequila, that could be my silver lining.



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4 responses to “I know you didn’t think I was a ‘look on the bright side’ kind of person.

  1. Too bad we don’t live near each other – you could help me pack the remainder of the margarita mix and tequila. Really, I think you need queso though for a proper silver lining. Cheese makes everything better.

    I will say that men really are better at compartmentalizing, which is why they can be turn off Pissed About Work mode and slip into Happy Go Lucky Guy mode when they leave. Well, at least they have a better shot at it than we do. I was telling a guy friend once about a person who had made me so upset at work that I was literally shaking, and he told me that it was over now, I should let it go and stop letting it bother me. Then I killed him.

  2. Liz

    I have noticed the same thing in grad school. The women in my lab, myself included, use every little failure as a reason they’re not good enough for grad school. The guys on the other hand, go to our boss and try to argue every failure into a success. I can’t seem to operate that way but I certainly wish I did.

  3. Lori – if by ‘pack’, you mean ‘drink’, that sounds like an excellent idea. Sadly I am too far away – you will have to carry on the packing without me!

    Liz – yeah, why is that? Personally, I think the guy approach of never admitting mistakes is pretty annoying. But it’s still better than beating yourself up over every little thing.

  4. -R-

    I agree with you on the theory. I hope it gets better soon!

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